I have decided to start this blog stuff again.....as a way of therepy for myself!! Maybe just maybe hoping it helps me and maybe even someone else that maybe going through the same journey in their lives!!!
So here goes......
Where to start... if i start at the beginning you may fal asleep...so i will start from the time i felt the world around me crumble.....just a few words in a sentence started it......Your sister has breast cancer.......My sister is my rock, always has been and always will be!! My first words ripped through me shards of broken glass.....What about Alex (her 11 yr old son)...the the next was this aint fucken fair (excuse the language) she is only 39 yrs old.... I had recently quit smoking, though i went for my emergency stash of ciggies, everything else around me felt like a blur...next thing i noticed me sitting in a mess of tears with a glass of wine (i never drank alone) & calling her...my rock.....my beautiful sister Ali, my idol, my strength through all my ruff days when my son was incredibly ill....now i can return the favour....or so i thought......
All she wanted to do is hide from the world...her family included...to process i expect....to this day i still cant ask her as it upsets us both thinking back to then!! ...
So we all coped through the tuff stuff, the op's and the wake of the op's!! Life we all realised would never be the same in our family!!......How true was that...
6 Weeks after my sister was diagnosed, my father, the families rock, a tower of strength yet a gentle lion, was diagnosed with prostate cancer.........OMG what the heck was happening to us....what the hell had we done to recieve this run of bad luck........yes i went through these questions many times recently....i always looked towards an old friend of mine who was now coming to the final weeks of her life and found a strength within me that i never knew existed.....
until then, May 2009....when i found my spiritual side......no not religion...but my connection to spirit and loved ones!!!!.....my journey starts there....
So here goes......
Where to start... if i start at the beginning you may fal asleep...so i will start from the time i felt the world around me crumble.....just a few words in a sentence started it......Your sister has breast cancer.......My sister is my rock, always has been and always will be!! My first words ripped through me shards of broken glass.....What about Alex (her 11 yr old son)...the the next was this aint fucken fair (excuse the language) she is only 39 yrs old.... I had recently quit smoking, though i went for my emergency stash of ciggies, everything else around me felt like a blur...next thing i noticed me sitting in a mess of tears with a glass of wine (i never drank alone) & calling her...my rock.....my beautiful sister Ali, my idol, my strength through all my ruff days when my son was incredibly ill....now i can return the favour....or so i thought......
All she wanted to do is hide from the world...her family included...to process i expect....to this day i still cant ask her as it upsets us both thinking back to then!! ...
So we all coped through the tuff stuff, the op's and the wake of the op's!! Life we all realised would never be the same in our family!!......How true was that...
6 Weeks after my sister was diagnosed, my father, the families rock, a tower of strength yet a gentle lion, was diagnosed with prostate cancer.........OMG what the heck was happening to us....what the hell had we done to recieve this run of bad luck........yes i went through these questions many times recently....i always looked towards an old friend of mine who was now coming to the final weeks of her life and found a strength within me that i never knew existed.....
until then, May 2009....when i found my spiritual side......no not religion...but my connection to spirit and loved ones!!!!.....my journey starts there....
Labels: The start of the blackest year for my family...2009....
posted by Life as i now live it!!! ;o) at 10:06 PM
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